Inspirational Coach from Orange Hits 400-Win Mark

It’s 5:30 in the morning; do you know where your children are? If they play softball at Platt Tech High School, chances are they’re at practice.

That is the time at which all 30 players meet each morning to learn the fundamentals of the game from Head Coach Sue Murphy.

It’s been this way at the regional school in Milford for more than 15 years, back when Murphy quipped that she’d have to hold practice before school or stop coaching altogether to spend more time with her growing family.

The players took her seriously and apparently, it’s been a recipe for success: last week, “Coach Murph” won her 400th high school softball game when Platt knocked off Goodwin Tech 8-6.

“All it means is I’m getting old,” she joked.

Murphy, 51, of Orange, is humble almost to a fault. Part of the reason she hasn’t personally made a big deal about the feat is because she doesn’t judge her success by wins and losses. Murphy, who is also the athletic director and a physical education teacher at Platt, says she didn’t know her record until she was asked to complete a profile a couple years ago when she won teacher of the year.

You see, Murphy is more concerned about teaching her players skills they will use for the rest of their lives: don’t lie, don’t cheat, school comes first, work harder than everybody else. These are some of the themes that players have learned over the years. And in some cases, they learned them the hard way.

Two years ago, former Platt Tech catcher Alyssa Donovan wanted to get out of a school assignment. So she told the teacher she had a softball commitment.

“Coach Murph said you can’t use softball as an excuse,” explained Donovan, the only all-state player in Murphy’s career. “But I did anyway.”

When Murphy found out, she threatened to kick Donovan off the team if she didn’t come clean to her teacher, and ultimately gave her a one-game suspension. The next game happened to be a big one, but Murphy risked losing to teach Donovan a lesson.

“She holds them accountable, whether you’re the last girl on the bench or the number one player on the team,” said assistant coach Myke Kuslis. “The rules are the rules with everybody. She could probably be way over 400 wins, but she has sat some of her best players for not living up to the rules.”

Her coaching method can most aptly be described as tough love. Donovan, who at first was upset with Murphy, now refers to her as a “second mom” of sorts.

“She is always there for us, no matter what,” Donovan said.

That is true even when her players graduate. Donovan is now a freshman on the Newbury College softball team in Boston. Two weeks ago, when Newbury played at Western Connecticut State University, Murphy loaded her players on a bus and brought them to Danbury to see Donovan play.

“To see her there, especially after all that’s happened (in Boston last week), was just incredible,” Donovan said. “It really shows much just how much she cares.”

NO CUTS

There were a lot of girls on that bus to Danbury. The reason is that Murphy doesn’t cut anyone.

“My theory is that if you are willing to get here at 5:30 in the morning and commit to this team, then you deserve to play,” she said.

That means she is getting a variety of players, from those who have a wealth of experience on travel teams and the like, to those who have never picked up a bat.

This year, the team starts five freshmen and has exceeded expectations with a 7-3 record.

For players like ace pitcher and junior captain Brooke Pawlak, getting those wins takes commitment that few college players or pros can imagine, let alone teenage girls.

Pawlak gets up at 4:45 a.m. so she can leave her house in Ansonia and be at school for 5:15. She gets the equipment ready, prepares the team and waits for the clock to strike 5:30. For every minute late, a player has to run one lap.

“It can be tough and some people complain about the time, but eventually you realize that you’d rather play for Coach Murph than anyone else,” Pawlak said.  “She’s not only a great coach but also a great person. She cares not just about you as a player, but also about what’s happening at home, at school and in your personal life.”

Pawlak cited an example from this year when a sophomore came out for the team. Pawlak and others were frustrated with the girl because they believed she wasn’t giving 100 percent and had a bad attitude.

Murphy, who has three girls of her own ranging from 16 to 21, knew there must be something happening in the girl's life to make her act out. Murphy talked to the girl’s middle school teachers and counselors; she learned that there were personal issues affecting the teen and how to help her, Pawlak said.

“She could have just given up on this girl,” Pawlak said. “Instead of taking her off the team and punishing her, she did her homework and did her best to work with her and develop her."

Now, the girl who never used to smile comes in smiling every day, she’s getting involved, she’s making friends, "all because coach took the time,” she said.

Pawlak’s mother, Cheryl, said she couldn’t ask for a better coach for her daughter. “She holds them to high standards and she leads by example,” Cheryl Pawlak told Patch. “And at the same time, she knows how to keep the girls motivated and have fun. I’m very grateful for her time and what she does for the girls.”

THE CAREER THAT ALMOST WASN'T

Murphy grew up in Orange and attended Amity Regional High School, where she is now a member of the Hall of Fame. She was a standout three-sport athlete, and attended Eastern Connecticut State University, where she starred on the softball field and earned a business degree.

When she graduated, she took a job as a substitute teacher in the physical education department at Emmett O’Brien Technical High School in Ansonia. And she took a softball coaching job at Eli Whitney Technical High School in Hamden because the team had nobody else. 

“At the end of the season, I remember coming home and waking my parents up telling them this is what I want to do with my life,” she said.

She earned a master’s degree in physical education, a certification in health and headed back into the classroom.

She coached for a year at Eli Whitney, four years at Emmett O’Brien and has spent 24 years at Platt.

“Every year, I wonder if I can do it again,” she said of softball. “But by the second week, I’m excited, I'm hyper, I'm ready to go. I guess I’ll give it up when I stop having that feeling."

Murphy said she has high expectations for her players, who come from 24 sending towns, and that they deserve credit for living up to the standards. She also says that no one player is more important than the next, which is why she doesn’t give out a most valuable player award and holds a banquet for every year of all sports, the cost of which is offset the annual Platt Tech 5K, which Murphy has organized for 20 years.

“This is the way I was coached,” she said. “Clyde Washburne (the former softball coach at ECSU) always made it about working hard and having fun in the process. I’m trying to pay that forward and keep that spirit alive.”

She thanks her children – Callie, 21, Hannah, 19, and Mattie, 16 – as well as her husband, Ken Sokoloski, for their unwavering support.

“I couldn’t do everything I do without my family being so supportive,” she said. “And we wouldn’t so successful (at Platt) without the quality of kids we get here. When they are training, it’s like they are training for a marathon. The rules are stricter than anything they’ve ever experienced. And they all step up.”

When Patch called, Murphy was in between classes, listening to messages from other athletic directors and answering student questions. As usual, she was doing five things at once and didn't have much time to talk. And who can blame her: 5:30 comes quick.